Have you ever had that feeling of being struck by the fact that you are not where you are supposed to be, or rather of being somewhere and knowing exactly that that is where you are supposed to be? I've had this feeling before. When I went back to Berlin for the first time in three years in 2003 I knew that I was meant to live there. If not forever, at least for a short while. And by 2005 I had managed to do it and lived a "Berliner Leben" for a little over two years. I still miss it sometimes, but most of all I miss my friends.
This new feeling I'm having came on August 31 at almost the very moment when I saw the Colorado Rockies after landing in Denver. THIS is where I'm supposed to be, I thought. The five days I spent there visiting family friends confirmed it all the more. A landscape filled with my favorite yellow sunny flower, a pure freshness in the air, people who were generally with no exception unbelievably friendly and easy going, and a place that had fully embraced my nutritional choices - it was almost too good to be true. While none of my best friends live there, somehow I just know that there is where I'm supposed to be. August was doubtlessly the best month I've ever had as a translator, but it came at the expense of being physically and mentally drained by the time the month was over. The 5 days of vacation weren't really enough for me to recover and since I've been back I've found myself increasingly longing for the life I want, but yet is somehow still out of reach. I've found myself more melancholy, in need of companionship and friendship, yet at the same time all the more boxed into my world of work, which is at the same time my home.
How do I regain a life-work balance, when working is essentially my life? Essentially I probably I need to work a bit less so that I can make more room in my life for a personal life. While I love what I do and the people I work for, I need to be more mindful of my own needs and care for myself so that I am always in the right frame of mind to do my very best. I'm excited to be returning to Denver in October to attend a national translators' conference, which will hopefully be an excellent networking opportunity to give me the tools to better myself and my business. Another translator I work with has been urging me to attend and today after getting a bit of a wake-up call I figured she was probably right. It doesn't hurt that the conference is in one of my favorite places on earth. Give me 3-5 years and hopefully you'll be calling me a Colorado girl. There are some feelings that you know you just have to act on or else you might regret doing nothing - this is one of them.
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